LEADERS NEED NOT LEAD A WORK TEAM TO SERVE AS ROLE MODELS

Sometimes coincidences happen in a way that drive home a point about leadership. They are not planned. They are not intentional, They are not anticipated. This happened for me during the past week concerning the importance and impact of being a role model.

Early in the week I was having a discussion with my son about his recently receiving a promotion at work. We discussed his opportunity to apply so much of what he has learned over the years about leadership in his new managerial position.

During our conversation, we spoke about the importance of his new leadership platform, of his serving as a role model for each of his direct reports and his peers. He offered, “Dad, I still remember a key point from one of your leadership presentations. You say that when we are leaders, people pay attention to four things – what we do, what we don’t do, what we say and what we don’t say.”

We talked about how leaders must accept that they are always on stage, that people are always watching them. We discussed how all leaders are role models, every day. Some leaders are positive role models. We learn from them and want to remember those lessons to implement when we ourselves become leaders. Other leaders are negative role models: we learn from them what not to do and we make promises to ourselves not to repeat their leadership behaviors when our leadership time arrives.

This role modeling conversation with my son was reinforced later in the week when I received an uplifting email from my friend Michael Reuter. As I have mentioned here before, Mike is the retired Director Emeritus of the Buccino Leadership Institute at Seton Hall University in West Orange, New Jersey. He writes a wonderful weekly leadership blog (www.threeminuteleadership.com) that I highly recommend.

This week, in addition to circulating his regular inspiring leadership blog post, Mike shared a story about role modeling that I want to share with you. It was written by Mike’s friend, Kevin Flanagan. Please read it and reflect on it:

“During the middle school conference cross country meet, the parents anxiously watched from about 100 yards away as two lead runners, who had broken away from the pack, headed into the woods. One of them was Shea McGuire, a fiercely competitive girl from my daughter’s class who was the best runner in the school. What was so entertaining about watching Shea run was that she wasn’t the fastest on the field, but she had a grit that always gave her the edge to push herself to win. Her trademark was to wait until the last quarter of any race she was running, then pour it on—usually breaking the will of whoever was hanging on.

The other runner was her rival, who had also won every race up to this meet, and she had a very different style of running which was smooth and strong – she seemed to almost glide through the course. We were watching a unique duel between two great runners.

As they emerged from the woods about a minute later, Shea was starting her push, but we could see the other runner was giving it her all to keep up. As they came down a slope on the course something unexpected happened— the other runner tripped – and went down hard. As spectators, we gasped at the sight and figured that at this point, the race was over, and Shea would take first place.
However, our second and more shocking surprise came when this little 11-year-old girl, who seemed like she would do anything to win, stopped. She turned around, went back to help the other girl up, and seeing that she’d badly sprained her ankle, put her arm over her shoulder and walked with her to the finish.

As they walked and the other runners passed, there was an almost holy silence among the parents. We all knew that we were witnessing something more beautiful than words could ever say. As we watched these two running rivals walking arm in arm, we were being reminded of the very thing we all want our world to be… and they weren’t talking about doing it – they were doing it, living it. That is it! Reminding us that winning takes on many forms, and looks very different than what the world might call it.

What we do is so much more than what we say, and it is the only thing that really lasts. It is by and through the way we live our lives that we reflect to the world who we are and what we are all about. When we seek listening over talking, understanding over convincing, forgiveness over resentment, giving over taking, and hope over despair, we truly move our world towards love over hate. It is in our actions that we do this. It is when we are truly willing to lose it all to help another that we indeed win. When we stop our race to the finish line and go back to help someone who’s stumbled in life, we are living what we want our world to be.

Winning the race is nice, and in a sense, it is its own reward. I’ll speak these radical words in a competitive world—winning isn’t really the point in life. Giving all we can with what we have is—and in that effort, helping another soul do the same is how we are called to use the gifts we’ve been given. Every step we take, helping another towards the finish, is a step closer to having lived a life true to its meaning.

That day, as Shea McGuire came over the line, she’d won so much more than a race—she’d won the hearts of all who beheld her act of love, and indeed she, along with all of us, were better for having witnessed her loving act.

There is a saying in running, “When your legs get tired, run with your heart.” Know this—we weren’t put here to win; we were put here to run our best race. Let’s remember in our busy days to run the race we were put here for—and let’s run it, our race, not someone else’s. Our hearts will guide us as we do, and we will know we’re on track because that same goodness and love that Shea McGuire showed us that day will be at the core of what we do and how we live. It does not matter how fast we go or how many medals we pile up; what really matters most is that we finish our race well.”

Please think about Kevin’s message. Remember that we need not be official managers or leaders in the workplace to serve as role models. If we keep our eyes and ears open at all times, we will find role models all around us, including 11-year-old runners.

If you believe this content would resonate with a friend or colleague, please feel free to forward it along!

-Larry