LEADERS DON’T WAIT FOR THE RESIGNATION LETTER
Ulli Hildebrand is the founder of Pin-Point Solutions LLC and a former Head of HR at Mercedes-Benz USA and Benteler Automotive. I appreciate her contributing this week’s guest post.
A few years ago, a former colleague called me in a panic. One of his key people had just resigned – effective in two weeks. He had not seen that coming. She had seemed fine. No complaints, no warning signs he had noticed. She had simply decided to leave, made her plans, and then told him when everything was already in motion.
“What did I miss?” he asked me.
The answer, I told him, was not dramatic. He had not missed a blow-up or a complaint. He had missed something much more subtle: the slow, quiet withdrawal that happens when a talented person stops feeling seen, stops believing in their path forward, and begins mentally checking out long before physically walking out the door.
This is one of the most painful (yet preventable!) leadership failures I have encountered in my work with organizations.
Most leaders are reactive when it comes to retention. They invest in their people after a resignation lands on their desk. They conduct exit interviews and learn what they could have done differently, when it is already too late to act on that information.
The cost is significant: replacing people typically runs between 50 and 100 percent of their annual salary, and that figure does not account for the disruption to clients, the pressure on remaining team members, or the institutional knowledge that walks out the door with them.
What separates great leaders from average ones, in my experience, is not just how they respond to people – it is how well they see people before a problem becomes a crisis.
Here is what I have come to believe after nearly two decades in executive HR roles and years of working with leaders: retention is not an HR problem; HR can help fix things after the fact. Retaining talent is a leadership challenge. And like most challenges, it starts with awareness.
The leaders who keep their best people share a few common habits. First, they are intentional about which roles matter most to their organization’s ability to function. They do not treat all turnover equally; they know which vacancies would create serious disruption and they prioritize their energy accordingly. (Note: Good leaders attend to all employees as needed, even if they focus on mission-critical roles first.)
Second, they actively pay attention to signals of disengagement. Not just performance metrics, but the harder-to-see shifts in energy and emotional investment.
· Is someone who used to be enthusiastic now just going through the motions?
· Is a high performer suddenly coasting?
· Is someone who was always on time now late (in person or delivering their work)?
· Does someone who used to raise his or her hand to volunteer keep that hand down?
· Does someone who was quick to offer help to their peers stay silent?
· Is someone who was on board suddenly questioning what’s going on and why?
These are not performance problems yet; they are early warning signs that give a leader an opportunity to act.
Third – and this is the one most leaders skip – they have conversations before the crisis. Not to interrogate or pressure, but to genuinely (re)connect. To ask what is going on. To remind a valued teammates that they are seen.
None of this is complicated. But it requires something that many leaders, especially in fast-growing organizations where everything feels urgent, struggle to make room for: intentional attention to the people, not just the work.
I have started encouraging leaders to think of this as building a “flight risk radar.” Not a formal HR system or a complicated technology. Just a regular, honest practice of asking: who on my team might be drifting? And what would it take to re-engage them before they decide the answer is to leave?
Larry has previously written about the value of stay interviews – the practice of asking your current employees what keeps them here and what might pull them away. That conversation, done well, is one of the most powerful retention tools a leader has. But it works best when it is part of an ongoing rhythm of connection, not a one-time check-in triggered by a sudden concern.
If you are leading a team right now and you haven’t recently asked your key people what they need to feel valued, what their growth aspirations look like, or whether they see a future here – that conversation is worth having. Not because something is wrong. Because you are the kind of leader who does not wait to find out.
If you would like a simple starting point, I have put together a free 3-Step Guide to Keeping Your Key People that walks through the framework I use with my clients. You can download it here.
Ulli helps growing companies build the talent infrastructure they need to scale without losing the people who matter most. Learn more at www.pin-pointtalent.net and connect with her on LinkedIn (https://www.linkedin.com/in/ulrikehildebrand/)
If you believe this content would resonate with a friend or colleague, please feel free to forward it along!
-Larry